Ewen ([info]thefallenangel1) wrote,
  • Mood: hopeful
script update #1:



"All The Things That Could Of Been"

[The scene opens with Vic and Eric arguing. There is no sound. Vic rips a script from Eric’s hands and tears it up and as he throws it the scene pauses.]

[A voice starts talking]

Vic:
“It wasn’t always like this. They say these are supposed to be the best days of our lives. The funny thing about happiness is it’s complete impartialness. It doesn’t care about race, it doesn’t care about gender, and it certainly does not care about age. The only thing I had going in my life was my best friend, and now I don’t have that. Emptiness never felt so…empty. My name is Vic, and this is my story.”

[The screen fades to black and the word: “Genesis” appears and fades]

[6:23 AM, Day 1]

[The camera slowly floats over empty streets in a small town as the credits roll and Vic talks]

Vic:
“This is my town. If you’d call it that. Maybe a village, maybe a resort to some. We have five hundred and sixty one residents, and counting. As you can imagine, living in a town this small, you’re either with the right people, or you’re not. I know this, and I also know I’ll never be like them. And that’s okay. It’s okay to be different. My story may be different, or it may be cliché. My story may be tragic, or it may be heroic. We all know the fine lines in life…somehow I always found myself walking them.”

[The camera shows Vic lying in bed staring at the ceiling.]

Vic:
“Here I am. You can’t see the bubble over my head, but I’m thinking about my future. For the longest time I knew I’d be leaving this town for Oxford University. I knew I didn’t have much choice, after all, my dad went there, and his dad went there. Who am I to break tradition? But some days you’ll find in life, that fate gives you a split road. It really doesn't give a shit about tradition. Once you travel down one road, you’ll constantly question it. Tradition or no tradition. My test was a split road. Sometimes those tests cut you in half. You forever feel separated from who you once were. So here I am, only three days before the fork in roads. Only three days away from total breakdown. Three days away from finally falling off the line. Maybe I’m better for it, maybe I’m not. You can decide.”

(copyrighted and all that crap that no one cares about)

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  • 8 comments

[info]silentlestat

January 27 2006, 10:15:59 UTC 6 years ago

WRITE MORE!!! I love it so far!

[info]sh_y

January 28 2006, 06:04:44 UTC 6 years ago

"You can’t see the bubble over my head,

but I'm thinking about my future." - is a good one :D.

Go ahead!

[info]thefallenangel1

January 28 2006, 06:26:03 UTC 6 years ago

Re: "You can’t see the bubble over my head,

it's a better intro then the one i sent you haha.
i hate writers block...do you think i'm on the right road now?

[info]sh_y

January 28 2006, 08:15:15 UTC 6 years ago

You're on the right road,

absolutely.

We're waiting for more, definitely.

[info]theskygrowsdark

January 28 2006, 11:00:00 UTC 6 years ago

wowww. this is really good.
i can't wait to read more.

[info]zuridea

January 29 2006, 00:12:38 UTC 6 years ago

Hmmm... I am definitely intrigued by the story. I like the flow and syntax. The wording is beautiful. It's great exposition, quite catching.

I really enjoy the basis of the opening scene, with silence but you see the movements of the characters and then a sudden pause of action.

My question to you is have you ever investigated formatting and screenplay writing? I like the basics...but I would recommend looking into The Screenwriter's Bible by David Trottier, which is simply brilliant. It helps with setting scenes, describing action, etc. It's helped me immensely in learning the couple of SP's I have written.

Oh, and is this a full length or a short? That's just my inane curiousity...

I absolutely ADORE where you are going with this. If you need/want any help, let me know. Looking forward to seeing the next part.

[info]thefallenangel1

January 29 2006, 03:34:12 UTC 6 years ago

i have read sp stuff, and the whole "how to do".
i don't really care about that, as much as some would.
i just want to do this for me, and if im not exactly following
a formula, that's okay too. as long as this gets done sooner or later.
it's a full length (hopefully) script.

[info]zuridea

January 29 2006, 23:20:16 UTC 6 years ago

That's awesome that you are just doing it for you. That's where the best writing comes from...and this is really good writing.

Good luck on the next part. I'm really interested in where the story is going. Take care.
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